Best. Products. Ever.

The countdown:

5) Fire
4) Food
3) Portable DVD players for plane rides with kids
2) The wheel

and

1) The Subtle Butt: disposable gas neutralizers.

That's it. That's the list. End of story. We have a winner. There will never, ever, be a greater invention in the history of mankind. How did this take until 2008 to get done? And if we can do this, how can we not come up with an alternate energy source?

The Subtle Butt is a discreet stench-absorbing pad that you stuff in your shorts. For $9.95, you can finally stop blaming the dog.