Thursday, May 15, 2008

The Husband Test

So you probably saw "Wife Test" from 1939 floating around the interwebby (e.g. "Slows down card games with chatter - 1 Demerit"). Well, there is a husband one too. This flickr page has them scanned in - so check out the husband ones. Some faves:

Demerits:
"Publicly praises bachelor days and regrets having married" (This is only 1 demerit - seems important, though)

"Leaves shoes in living room" (Uh, that's where my feet were, honey)

"Blames wife for everything that goes wrong" (again, only 1 demerit)

"Uses vulgarity or profanity" (what f*$&ing profanity?)

"Dislikes to dress or shave on Sunday" (whoops)

Merits:
"Has date with wife at least once a week" (oooh, +5 points)

"Reads newspaper, books, or magazines aloud to wife" (is she supposed to be illiterate?)

"Carries adequate insurance" (another +5 points - apparently its a bonus that you can poison him for the insurance when he leaves his shoes lying around)

"Usually comes home with a smile" (that's great - but what if it's because he was just at the strip bar?)

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